Tag Archives: SuckaFish

Cowboys vs. Nobody: Bye Week Cheat Sheet

Posted by SuckaFish

The Cowboys are off this week. It’s your chance to use the RedZone Channel and the Sunday Ticket to the fullest of your abilities despite the fact that DirecTV is going to use this time to screw you unmercifully.

Here’s everything you need to read before next week’s Cowboys kickoff.

If DeMarcus Ware isn’t your favorite player, he will be after you watch this (E:60)

Looks like Wade Phillips will be unemployed soon (Four-letter network)

The controversial video has been moved, temporarily (PFT)

More feel-good, off-the-field stuff (FanHouse)

FOX apologized for reporting the fact that Yoko Romo is fat (FanHouse)

Is Wade the worst coach in the NFC East? (Bleacher Report)

Finally, even Redskin Hall of Famers hate the Redskins

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Week 5 NFL Picks: Me vs. a Two Year Old

Posted (for) SuckaFish

Each week I’ll be picking games in a head-to-head competition with an intellectual equal, my two-year-old daughter. I put the logos of the two teams playing each other on the screen and she pointed to (or said things like “helmet” for the Browns or “Tiger” for the Jaguars) the team she prefers.

Here are the picks for Week 5:

Game SuckaFish Two-Year-Old Daughter
Browns @ Bills Browns Browns
Cowboys @ Chiefs Cowboys Chiefs
Vikings @ Rams Vikings Vikings
Raiders @ Giants Giants Raiders
Bucs @ Eagles Eagles Eagles
Steelers @ Lions Steelers Lions
Redskins @ Panthers Panthers Panthers
Bengals @ Ravens Ravens Ravens
Falcons @ 49ers 49ers 49ers
Jaguars @ Seahawks Seahawks Jaguars
Texans @ Cardinals Cardinals Texans
Patriots @ Broncos Patriots Patriots
Colts @ Titans

Jets @ Dolphins

Colts

Jets

Colts

Jets

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Cowboys vs. Broncos: Gameday Cheat Sheet

Posted by SuckaFish

The Cowboys play the Broncos in Denver at 4:15 ET, DirecTV channel 714. Here’s everything you need to read before kickoff.

Barber will play, but not much (Matt Mosely)

What did Wade learn from his first head coaching job? (ESPNDallas.com)

Chatting with the enemy (Blogging the Boys)

DeMarcus is getting restless (Star Telegram)

The evolution of Tony Romo (Ed Werder)

Is Flozell about to be suspended? (Cowboys Corner)

Somebody is ready to breakout (Dallas Morning News)

Five things to watch (Star Telegram)

Experts are split (CBSSports.com)
Experts like Dallas (ESPN.com)

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Not a Great Day for Redskin Families

Posted by SuckaFish

Two rough stories today about Redskins and family members.

Sean Taylor’s mom is facing bankruptcy and may lose the house he bought for her. (Daily Finance)

Albert Haynesworth’s estranged wife wants some serious cash to pay bills. Oh, and a restraining order. (FanHouse)

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NFL Week 3 Wrap-up: Tweet Style

Posted by SuckaFish

TO blasts an NBC analyst, Vernon Davis has class, Mark Sanchez is boring, and Martellus Bennett breaks necks. Here’s a quick trip around the league featuring Tweets from real live NFL players.

Terrell Owens had no catches for the first time in 185 games. He said all the right things in the post game interviews but then attacked NBC analyst Rodney Harrison via Twitter (@terrellowens), three times:

I could less about Rodney Harrison! Anybody tht using steroids, yes STEROIDS rodney, is a cheater & cheated the game!

Is tht Y u used steroids b/c u were worried about ur stats or ws it b/c u were losing it? Lol! U’re a loser & a cheater? Got any steroid

Hey rodney! Send me sum steroids 2 the Bills facility next week!

Vernon Davis had seven catches for 96 yards and two TDs, including the score that put the Niners ahead in the fourth. He then watched Brett Favre make the play of the day, hitting Greg Lewis in the end zone with two seconds left. Davis (@VernonDavis85) took the high road in his post-game Tweet.

We lost but im proud of my teammates they did a great job! We def got what it takes to be the best!

Mark Sanchez proved once again that he has a very bright future in the NFL leading the Jets to a 24-17 win over the Titans. He also hit up his Twitter account (@Mark_Sanchez) to prove once again that he is as boring as dirt.

Big win @ home today. Defense was lights out again! Shout out to the fans! We’ll need it again next week. A lot of work to do! Go Jets!

The Cowboys play Monday night but Martellus Bennett is already finding humor in potentially paralyzing opponents. He got people fired up by Twittering (@Jupiters_Crunch):

Big game tomm. Another chance to set the tone as a team tomm. Break necks then cash checks. Ha can’t wait

Dallas better not fall to 0-2 in Jerry’s World or Wade may enter the Zorn Zone.

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The Redskins Think Your Team Sucks

Posted by SuckaFish

Seriously, he's their voice of reason.

Seriously, he's their voice of reason.


The ‘Skins spent most of the week blaming the fans for booing them and the media for being too tough on them. But then the voice of reason grabbed the mic. Believe it or not, the voice of reason was Clinton Portis.

Portis told reporters that they team was being booed by their own fans because they weren’t providing entertainment worth the sky-high prices. He said that everyone was on the hot seat including himself. He said everything that should have been said by 53 players and coaches. And then he said this.

“I really do think on paper we’ve got the most talented team in the NFL.”

Do you have any idea how hard it is to score nine points against the Rams at home. That takes talent.

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Cowboys 2009 Week-by-Week Predictions

Posted by SuckaFish

Here are the official SuckaFish picks for the Cowboys season.

Date Opponent Pick
Sun, Sept 13 @ Tampa Bay Win
Sun, Sept 20 NY Giants Loss
Mon, Sept 28 Carolina Win
Sun, Oct 4 @ Denver Win
Sun, Oct 11 @ Kansas City Win
Sun, Oct 18 Bye I watch Red Zone Channel all day
Sun, Oct 25 Atlanta Loss
Sun, Nov 1 Seattle Win
Sun, Nov 8 @ Philadelphia Loss
Sun, Nov 15 @ Green Bay Loss
Sun, Nov 22 Washington Win
Thurs, Nov 26 Oakland Win
Sun, Dec 6 @ New York Giants Win
Sun, Dec 13 San Diego Win
Sat, Dec 19 @ New Orleans Loss
Sun, Dec 27 @ Washington Win
Sun, Jan 3 Philadelphia Win

So they end up 11-5. I don’t love every single pick (I feel like they could win the home opener against the Giants but then I’d have them going into the bye week 5-0) but that’s the record I thought they’d have. They are who I thought they were. Or who I hope they’ll be.

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